FINDING PURPOSE IN LIFE

The one question that everyone is asking, and no one knows the answer to. How do you find your purpose? Living, without treading the path you were destined to follow, is a life that most people want not to become their reality, yet becomes ingrained of their daily routines and existence. How do you discover this path?Your purpose and passion, may possibly change several times throughout your life .Everyone has a purpose, but until they discover their purpose, life can seem like it is on repeat. Nothing seems to change, the days blur together from focusing on too many things at once, or nothing at all.

Purpose is something we talk about often in our houses, around our dinner table, in hospital and clinic waiting rooms, on long car rides or even in schools . It’s a topic poured out in searing tears and nights of protracted pain as many teens in their early 20s wrestle not only with finding their purpose but also with God about their purpose in life. It’s a concept fueling angry outbursts as a single straw shifts the balance and a fragile house of cards comes tumbling down. I know in the marrow of my bones that each of us, every single one of the 7.6 billion people on this spinning blue planet, was created with purpose.

As human beings we indulge ourselves in different vacations in life to seek meaning. Some of us see our purpose in the family and its responsibilities, some in their professions while some wander in the forests to seek answers. Purpose drives us on the path of determination and grit. Whether its to help those in need or to make money, there is no one out there who doesn’t have a purpose. Different people have a different take on the true purpose of life. But does it mean we will have to wander directionless in dark woods or cross seven seas to find our true calling in life, or we can find purpose here in our daily mundane chores? In my opinion, there is so much that we can do in our day to day lives which can greatly make a difference.

God speaks of it in His Word, reminding us He has a plan and a purpose for each of us, hope and a future. He encourages us to walk with Him, to love others, to do good to all, to do everything for His glory, to be still and know that He is God, and He reminds us that He will refresh the weary and satisfy the faint.Having a purpose means that at some level you believe it is your destiny to do something. You are willing to make a plan, to learn the rules and to develop certain skills.If you do not wholeheartedly believe in your purpose or if you are not passionate about what it is you are doing,then you’ll be getting yourself out of the right track.There’s got to be some incentive for you to embrace the extreme work that is required in order to achieve anything of importance, because, whether you like it or not, it also takes a lot more work to achieve something than you consider before attempting it.

Finding our purpose is directly related to finding our passions and acting on them.That feeling that something is missing goes away when we lead a passion-filled life. The need to seek our purpose comes from a lack of passion. When we don’t feel connected to our lives, we lack purpose and passion and to fix this emptiness,we simply need to add more passion. It’s important to have a purpose. I have seen lives filled with loneliness and despair when no specific purpose has been embraced. On the other hand, I have seen drastic improvements in psychological well-being when people have identified a meaningful purpose.

Purpose in life is the intended result of our focus, determination, and intention. It is the entire point of our existence.A purpose sets the entire context for our lives. Without a clearly defined purpose, we are just a haphazard combination of goals and non-goals and actions and non-actions meandering through space and time. A purpose is a master plan for our life. Knowing our purpose helps us define our goals. It helps us avoid getting lost in the minutia of daily life by keeping our eyes on the target. It can make life much more enjoyable and effortless. Purpose is not something that others choose for us; rather, it is something we must choose for ourselves. It emerges from an exploration of what we value most. When we are defining our purpose in life, it is important to not worry about how we will go about achieving it. When we identify and commit to our intentions, the opportunities and methods for achieving our purpose will begin to show up.

We don’t need to waste any more time stumbling through life. We should take time to identify our purpose and strive to let our purpose express itself each day in our work, our play, and our relationships. Living life on purpose will translate to better well-being for us,our family, and our world.Life purpose is much bigger than something we need to accomplish or a job that we have. It’s the entire meaning of our being. It’s the reason we eat, sleep, and breathe. It’s why we’re here and how we uniquely see the world.

Purpose is whatsoever your hands findeth to do,stop waiting on finding purpose.purpose was not lost in the first place.It has always been with you,be it loving,be it helping,be it serving,be it caring,do all with the whole of your heart because that right there is fulfilling purpose.God is not interested in waste,so in this you can be sure,whatsoever talents,gifts,grace,enablement,passion,desire that He gave they are lined up with your purpose.Lead a purposeful life,and follow your passion because that’s the purpose of life.

@M’-jay the counselor.

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“REAL LOVE”

I have thought it out and just to put it into clear logical words on what makes “real love”. It’s not just a “well I love him so I’ll put up with it” Or“I’ve been with him so long, so I guess this is it ’til death do us part.Real love is not something that makes your life harder.Many people want to be in

relationships, without really having a clue what it is all about or what they’re all about.Real love is akin to getting married, having babies, or even getting a dog. Many people have some romantic fantasy about all these things without looking at the work involved or the responsibility or the commitment required.They don’t think about how to live with a person every day, deal with a colicky new born, or manage a mouthy puppy who keeps eating the sofa.Being able to love and be loved for many years in a good and healthy way takes work. It takes resisting urges. It’s about making a decision not to do things that would wreck your relationship or hurt your partner—like calling someone a name, being selfish when you should help out, not acknowledging or caring about your partner’s needs, or having an affair. It includes big and little things. Love is an action, love is work, and love is a decision.
It doesn’t take work to be in a dysfunctional relationship; people do it all the time. Taking someone hostage or allowing yourself to be taken hostage is boring and predictable. It might be chaotic, destructive and dramatic, but in the end…same old same old.
To love someone, really love someone who really loves you, too, is about being a good and sane and supportive and caring partner; knowing how to understand and compromise; knowing to accept your partner for who he or she is without trying to change them.
It’s not about taking someone away from those they love. It’s not about being locked into some strange desperation with each other, hoping and praying that no one cracks the shell. Too many unhealthy relationships depend on each person convincing the other that the world is out to get one or both of them.Real love is an enlarging experience and dysfunctional love is a narrowing one,but anything that is enlarging comes with work and responsibilities,responsibility to self and to each other.Those in love must support each other’s hopes, dreams, and aspirations.
If you’re not there yet, you can start to work on what you will and will not do to nurture yourself and your idea of what a healthy relationship is.Thinking of some of the things we can do, that will almost guarantee a healthier relationship includes:
1. To find the right person, be the right person. Before you get back into a relationship, build your life. Finish your unfinished business. Become objective about what went wrong in your last relationship, and in the relationships before that. Do a relationship inventory and a life inventory. You must discover the patterns and habits that torpedoed previous relationships before you get into a new one. If you’re in a relationship and trying to salvage or save it, you—both of you must figure out and heal that which has been hurting you and your relationship. If one partner changes, the other is forced to change or leave. You cannot maintain the status quo when one of you chooses to change.
2. To be the right person and to find real love, you must develop your boundaries. Know what you stand for before you have to stand for it. Is an affair a deal breaker? What else will you NOT stand for:Pot abuse? Drunkenness? Forgetting to call? Standing you up? Not being financially stable?Not being honest? You have to know this before you are tested. You have to be able to say, “If x happens, I am out of here without argument.”
Make sure you know what would be a deal breaker for you—and make sure you break the deal if it happens. Be committed to walking away when a deal breaker breaks. If there are other things that you think deserve second and third chances, then commit to walking away the second or third time it becomes an issue. If you stay beyond that, you’re basically lying to yourself. Walk away for what you believe in. Otherwise you’ll just be stuck in dysfunction again and bargaining with yourself in order to accept what you shouldn’t accept.
3. Real love communicates in a healthy way. Name calling is out. Blaming and nitpicking is out. Accusations are out. Learn to begin sentences with “I feel” or “I think” or “In my opinion,” and be with others who communicate similarly. Don’t let anyone project onto you what you are thinking or feeling. Don’t defend yourself against that which you’re not doing. There is much game-playing in dysfunctional relationships. The only way to win is not to play. Healthy relationships are about forthright and honest communication.
4. Real love requires goals and aspirations, both individually and as a team. You have to have plans and dreams, and agree on the future. You must help each other fulfill your hopes and dreams as individuals and as a couple. Figure out what you’ve always wanted to do and do it. Find out what your partner wants in life and out of life. Figure out, early on, if you can and will support each other in achieving everything you’ve always wanted. It is important that you figure this out early on.
5. As a prelude to finding real love, learn to be discriminating in all your relationships with family, friends, acquaintances, and co-workers. Learn to make choices and not just let friendships and professional relationships happen. Don’t spend time with family just because they’re family. Choose to only have those in your life who are loving, respectful, honest, and open, and who care about you. Choose people who know that trust is earned and that once broken, it’s next to impossible to get back. Choose people who do not keep you guessing about how they feel, or how they feel about you(Don’t be an option). Choose people who are not ambivalent about you or their relationship with you.
Don’t put up with people who say, “I’m confused,” “I gotta be me,” or, “I want to be a good partner, but I don’t know how.” You get what you put up with. If you want less doubt in your life, stop putting up with it. Real love is discriminating and insists upon loving treatment no matter what.
6. Stop being a victim. Stop thinking you have no control over what happens to you. Most people stuck in unhealthy patterns (many of us) are stuck in a mud pit of denial, justification, and rationalization. Learn to call yourself on your own rationalizations, and stop believing the justifications that keep you stuck and victimized.You need to untangle yourself from any need you might have to be pitied. If you find yourself telling stories in which you were taken advantage of or someone did you wrong, and the stories are being told to generate sympathy, stop and realize that going through life as a victim is not attractive to healthy people. Take charge of yourself and what happens to you day in and day out.
7. Live with purpose. Spend some quiet time alone each day, without interruption, to think about your life and how it’s structured. Think about what you need to do to get better in different areas. Learn to meditate by getting quiet and relaxing(Prayers). Meditation is not sitting on a pillow chanting,it’s just learning to calm down and go inward without distraction. Living purposefully is the opposite of living randomly. It’s thinking about what you’re doing when you’re doing it. It’s about not looking at your phone every 10 minutes, or mindlessly checking Facebook 200 times a day. It’s about having your head where your feet are. Look around, and see what’s going on where you are at this very minute.
Learn to be disciplined and control your urge to be tied to your phone, to dive into ice cream when you’re not happy, or to do anything without really thinking about it. It’s about doing the “tough” things, like sitting with your feelings, going to the gym, or eating healthy. Spend some time each day thinking about your impulses and mindless behaviors. and ways in which you can improve your self-control and self-discipline. Quiet time each day is so important to building a healthy life. Try to stretch it out. Set goals for building the amount of time you can spend every day in quiet meditation and purposeful action . Having a say in everything you do and everything you don’t do is important to being healthy and being capable of giving and receiving real love – It is also important, when you’re in a relationship, to continue to cultivate this practice and to have your own “me time” and alone time every day.
8. Know that real love does not hurt. Yes, there are misunderstandings and upsets and disappointments in every relationship, but in healthy relationships they are not a regular happening. Real love and really loving relationships are consistent. They are not always easy, but they tend to run smoothly because everyone works at it. Love is what helps you deal with the curves that life throws at you—not what makes things more difficult. Love, real love, is support in a difficult world, not something that makes your life even harder. Real love gives each other the benefit of the doubt without being foolish about it. Pick your battles, and don’t fight over everything. Don’t be with people who turn everything into an argument or a challenge. It’s exhausting, and doesn’t need to be that way. Healthy people refuse to live that way.
9. Real love does not ask us to sacrifice that which we love. Not our interests, not our hobbies, not our friends and family. If someone is asking you to do that, it’s not healthy and not good for you. If you’re willing to do that without even being asked, it’s even worse. It’s normal to cocoon in a new relationship but after a time, you have to get back to the things and the people you love. Keep your life balanced; if you give up what you love and the people you love, you will look around one day and realize you can’t leave your relationship because you have nothing else. You may need to rework the ratios of how much time you give to each of your interests and loved ones, but it’s important that nothing (and no one) is treated as an afterthought.
10. The most important thing to know about real love is that love is an action from you and to you. Act it and insist on it. Every single day, whether in a relationship or not, you must affirm that love is what you do, not what you say, and you must insist upon it with everyone in your life. If it’s a “non-love” relationship (professional), respect is the action and you must be treated with respect in all your relationships.
If people understood what real love entailed they would be less inclined to go in and out of relationships in which they know they will experience anything but love. Use your time out of a relationship wisely, to build what you need to be in a healthy relationship.

#PSYCHOLOGICAL THOUGHTS

#COUNSELOR DAVID

@M-JAY

ACCEPTING THE THINGS WE CAN’T CHANGE.

Believing in our ability to transcend our circumstances and find peace in hearts regardless of them is the first step to accept the things you cannot change.
We often see our problems as things that block us from getting what we want. But what if our trials were part of the path and not detours? Things to carve us into the person we’re meant to be to live the life we’re meant to?

The common idea that we are limitless is not true. We cannot fly without an airplane. We cannot live constantly on-the-go; we must care for our bodies, giving them food and water and rest. Sometimes, the most pivotal experiences in our lives are things beyond our control.
Thinking that we are limitless encourages us to throw ourselves against brick walls. Instead, we often need to move over a few feet and find a new opening. Accept the things you cannot change instead of plow through them, trying to control everything.
Our lives come with certain constrains, challenges and lessons. To access our true nature of boundlessness, which comes when we fully merge with the divine, we must first accept our limits. Our limits are the things we cannot change.

In person there are a number of processes that always help me to accept the things i can never change and if well designed, i believe they can help us all in the process of accepting the things we cannot change:

Accept your feelings

The first step to accepting a situation is accepting your feelings about this situation. You may be angry or sad or anxious, but accepting how you feel creates a foundation for acceptance, forgiveness, and eventually, moving on.
You cannot change this thing, and you also cannot change your feelings. So acknowledge how you feel and your right to feel that way.
Try meditating , placing your awareness on the inside of your body, noticing feelings or other sensations and breathing into them as they arise. Another option is to
journal . Start by writing down the specific situation you’re working to accept, and then write “This makes me feel good😀,bad 😒or awful😫…”

Quiet your thoughts

Accepting your feelings does not mean letting your mind run wild in response to them. Feelings and thoughts are separate, even though it often seems they are one.
Although it can be good to analyze situations to learn from them, allowing the mind to pursue damaging tangents isn’t healing or productive, only self-sabotaging. When we feel emotional pain, painful thoughts naturally arise. By feeling the emotion, we heal the painful energy and clear space for logical thought, not pained thought.
While it’s important to honor our emotions, it’s important to recognize that thoughts sometimes prevent you from learning how to accept the things you cannot change. They keep you in resistance.
Meditate, exercise, or journal to process your emotions. Notice your thoughts, but don’t believe them. Trust that greater insight and answers are coming…Trust me you don’t wanna keep your faith and hope shaking 👌

Ask for help

The divine is always there to help us. So often, we try to bear our burdens alone, forgetting to ask for help-you need Friends👫👬.When we feel overwhelmed, it’s so nice to close the eyes and offer up our problems to the infinite source.
Saying, “I feel overwhelmed,Please help me see this differently,” puts our problems in perspective. It helps us realize that we aren’t alone, that the trials we endure have purpose, and it opens the door to divine intervention.
This intervention isn’t about the possibility of our problems being lifted away from us, but instead carries the seed of a different perspective, one that can help us heal and learn the lessons.
Sometimes, when we ask for help, we receive guidance from a book or conversation that shifts our perspective to see our trials in a more loving way. Other times, we simply receive a new idea. Asking for help increases the likelihood we will receive it…it works I’m a witness 😜

Cultivate gratitude for the challenge

On the spiritual path, there’s a special belief that is very powerful for increasing our ability to transcend a life situation and find the blessings. It’s the belief that our challenges are teachers.
When we believe life’s difficulties are lessons and not punishments, we’re better able to learn from them and rebound not more brittle, but more open and compassionate. When we understand that life involves growth, difficult situations don’t surprise us, but instead signal that it’s time to gear up for the tough work this path requires.
Having faith that every difficulty contains a blessing will help you accept the things you cannot change. Walk through the storm knowing there’s peace and maybe even a rainbow on the other side…light☀ at the end of every dark tunnel right?
It takes time for the lessons to come or for new opportunities to come into view, but in the meantime, practice cultivating gratitude for this teacher and faith that you will emerge stronger and wiser. Faith in the path helps us through the most trying times. Gratitude also helps us forgive ourselves and others.

Look for possibility

Like water in a river that flows around fallen branches, in our lives, we must learn to stop working so hard to clear the road before us when sometimes we need to simply flow around. When our sight is directed at clearing these hurdles, it blocks us from seeing the openings next to the problem that beckon us to them. Working to remove blocks keeps us in resistance, when we must practice acceptance for the things we cannot change.
Cultivating gratitude for the challenge and looking for the lessons it contains prepares us for this step, finding the possibility.

Well,as you heal and grow into new possibilities, which often mark the next chapter of expansion and blessing,i wish and hope that the things you once could not accept potentially will turn into the biggest blessings of your life-Patient 👌…just take the chances to see how strong you are and learn deep wisdom that will serve you for the rest of your life.

#An opportunity to always sail you in a new direction🚣

AM JUST AN AFRICAN CHILD.

I am an African Child,I am not an African because of my skin colour.I am not an African because I was born in Africa by African Parents.I am an African because Mama Africa was born in me.I am limitless because I have great gifts and talents.Africa is my home and I’m proud of my root.
Africa is not a country,Africa is a continent just like Asia, Europe and America.Mama Africa is blessed with a youthful population -vibrant youth who are willing to risk everything to have a decent shot of life.Mama Africa is not poor
We need foreign trade instead of foreign aids,Mama Africa needs strong and working institutions instead of strong men.
As an African child, I believe that I’m not too young to run.
As an African Child, I believe in Africa.I envision an Africa which will be a beacon of hope and opportunities,I see an Africa where everyone will live in harmony regardless of tribe, religion or colour.Sometimes, as an African child, I cry every dawn because of the way our leaders are running affairs.
Corruption is the chronic disease of Africa(Kenya😱)
As an African child, I will do my best to cure the disease of corruption,given the chance.One day, Africa will be borderless
There will be free movement in Africa .I don’t see myself as a Kenyan or a Tanzanian,I see myself as an African.
So call me the African Child.Give the African Child an opportunity and they will deliver.I believe in Mama Africa, Whether you are from the East, West, South or North.We are one people with one common goal.

To quote Thabo mbeki who was a prominent leader in South Africa,under the presidency of the Late Nelson Mandela and the second President of South Africa ,in his speech ” I AM AN AFRICAN” on may 8 1996,which happens to be the day and month of my birth (can’t agree less😜) he says “I am born of the peoples of the continent of Africa.
The pain of the violent conflict that the peoples of Liberia, and of Somalia, of the Sudan, of Burundi and Algeria is a pain I also bear.The dismal shame of poverty, suffering and human degradation of my continent is a blight that we share.
The blight on our happiness that derives from this and from our drift to the periphery of the ordering of human affairs leaves us in a persistent shadow of despair.
This is a savage road to which nobody should be condemned. The evolution of humanity says that Africa reaffirms that she is continuing her rise from the ashes.Whatever the setbacks of the moment, nothing can stop us now! Whatever the difficulties, Africa shall be at peace”.As an African child,this gives me hope and i rejoice in the diversity of our people,because it creates the space for all of us voluntarily to define ourselves as one people,and Today it feels good to be an African,It feels good that I can stand here as a Kenyan and as a foot soldier of a titanic African army,,,I am just born of the peoples of the continent of African,,,African child its time to Arise,Africa Arise!

HOW TO SURVIVE IN A KENYAN UNIVERSITY TODAY.

We all work so hard in high school, go through sleepless nights studying for our exams with the hope of getting good grades to qualify for university. Our teachers and parents tell us that the key to success is education. Our government also supports the education system in Kenya to ensure that they produce students who qualify to join regular universities. Their intention is tooling us with competencies necessary to compete in the global market. The ministry of Education is coming up with reforms that will prepare learners to boost their focus on learning and develop quality skills for the market.

After all this is said and done, those who qualify to join campus face a new challenge of the fear of how to survive in this new environment. Certainly, we have heard all kinds of stories of how people get lost in drug addiction while in campus, prostitution, and peer pressure. This makes students not know how to cope during their first year of university. Here are a few tips that can help you during this trying stage of your life.

1. Budget

One of the support that the government gives students in universities is Higher Education Loans, commonly known as HELB loan. Being a student all your life, you probably never have received such much money in your account. Many students often forget that this is a loan that they are expected to pay later during their working days and therefore end up wasting it on irrelevant things. You need to budget for this money well prioritizing on your rent, essentials, and bills. Invest it in something that will generate more money rather than squandering it on luxuries.

2. Know yourself

Joining campus can be challenging if you do not know who you are, what you stand for and your background. It is vital for you as a first-year student to have principles that will guide you make the right decisions so as not to be influenced by others. People come from different backgrounds, some rich others poor. The purpose of going through university is to be exposed in all aspects apart from education. You learn socially, academically and can grow spiritually. Knowing your background will help you resist people who don’t fit what you were taught while growing up.

3. Join helpful societies

The Kenyan Universities provide students with numerous opportunities to learn more through clubs and societies. Join a society that teaches you something new, something that you can identify with. Join one that you have common interests and stay open-minded. This will help you maintain a balance between your social and academic life. It also gives you an active lifestyle through activities and you can get scholarships through clubs like Aisec. This society has been incorporated in universities to help students get scholarship and internship opportunities.

4. Choose friends wisely

No man is an island. The friends you choose in campus will be your lifetime friends. Therefore, choose the right friends that help you grow in life rather than dragging you down. People in campus often move in groups. Do not be intimidated by this because by finding the right friends, you will definitely enjoy your campus life. Choose a friend who takes you to the library rather than one who looks for you on Friday night for a drinking spree. Peer pressure is what makes campus students engage in vices like drugs and prostitution.

5. Concentrate on your studies

Never forget that at the end of the five years, your parents are expecting a good grade that will make you a professional. Therefore, attend all lectures, visit the library for further research and do not skip CATs or exams. Let your lecturers be your friends rather than strangers that you meet on the pavements. You need to stay disciplined since there is no supervision in campus. Stay focused and make your parents proud at the end of your curriculum.

LIFE IS FUNNY

In continuation of the Self -Love special that we are doing this month I wanted to talk about fate and how it plays in our everyday lives more often than we realize.

These past few weeks I’ve been spending countless hours reading pins on Pinterest that are about life affirmations and manifesting our goals in life. I’ve seen these pins before but for the most part I usually look over them and not take into account what it all meant.

After reading a ton of affirmations there were a few things that I took away from them that I have always believed were true I just didn’t know how much it could shape our lives.

Now, I know to some of you reading this you may not believe in all of this hooplah and think I’m crazy but for great things to happen to you, you have to be a bit crazy or it wouldn’t be worth it.

If there’s anything that I have taken away from this whole “life” thing it is these two things – things always happen for a reason and believe in your goals and they will come true.

These will help you stress about life a little less and not think about the little things too deeply to the point where you assume the worst. For the most part things aren’t ever really that bad but our thoughts and emotions can make an event that isn’t dramatic seem worst then it is.

Life is funny in that way. For the most part things typically work in our favor but not in the way we would expect it too.

That’s what makes life so interesting.

Things Happen for a Reason

I’ve always believed in this saying and will forever believe in it. I like to look at it as a foreshadow to our future or our map guide to our lives.

I used to not always believe in this saying.

I didn’t understand why things I wanted to happen just didn’t work out. Of course, as a teenager when I would encounter a situation like this I believed that the world was out to get me.

To the teenagers reading this – THAT IS NOT TRUE.

It’s hard to see it now but one day when something does work in your favor then it will all make sense. This is when I feel we have to open our eyes and pay attention to our surroundings because there’s a lesson to be learned.

Despite the situation whether good or bad they are the things that we are suppose to experience in that part of our lives because if we encounter that situation again we’ll know what path to take that’ll be healthier for us.

That’s why in my opinion, we all have the same experiences but at different levels of our lives because the universe sees that we are ready to take on the next challenge whereas your friends or family members maybe not be ready for that level yet or has surpassed it.

For an example, losing your job or breaking up a seven year relationship.

When the challenge does come for you though, (and it will) be ready with open arms because Life is way too interesting to give up after coming this far.

Believe in Your Goals and They Will Come True

You have to experience it to believe me on this. I’m sure most of you have experienced it at least once even with something small. This can range from saving up money to get your first car or finally getting promoted to your dream job.

It happens more often than you realize but it takes setting your goals and believing that you’ll receive it for this to happen. Having confidence in yourself is quite crucial here.

If you’re constantly doubting yourself and doubting your abilities to make your desires come true than not much will change for you.

Lets say there is a trip your planning for and your bank account is looking a bit rough. I know the struggle lol but if you have your goal set, say the trip is in six months and you need to make $1000 to go.

First, don’t feel discouraged because that is easily attainable you just have to be disciplined and determined that you’re going to go on this trip. Second, make a plan of how you’re going to save your money. Let’s say you already have a job, then you’ll need to save $170 per month which is $43 per week that totals to a little over $1000. That’s way more doable than trying to scrounge for $1000 last minute.

If it helps place the saved money in either your savings account or cash it out and place it in a jar so you won’t be tempted to touch it.

But if you were quick to be discouraged first and not take the time to plan out an attainable goal for the trip than that’s an awesome opportunity you wouldn’t get to experience.

My Mom would always tell me and my siblings this all the time when we would get frustrated “Don’t get mad, adjust your thinking”. As a young child I didn’t really understand what she meant by this but the older I got the more it made sense. Don’t always believe that there is only one way to fix or accomplish something, sometimes you got to look at the challenge from different angle.

For the most part, it’s easy to be intimidated but don’t let that stop you from going after what you believe in or what feels right to you. If it was meant to happen to you everything will work out to your favor even if the end results doesn’t turn out the way you expected it to.

That’s what is funny to me about “life” and maybe some of you might agree is that, you got to believe in what you want to accomplish and expect to receive it but don’t expect too much from life that you’ll feel disappointed.

In other words, it’s best not to overthink too much. This is something I’m working on lol. It helps if you distract yourself with the idea of already achieving your goal and taking it one day at a time.

Like they say, You gotta Fake It till You Make It!

Maina Davis⛷

IT TAKES RISK TO GET THE REWARD.

In life, we are faced with the decision to chase or be chased. This could go for jobs, relationships or even friendships.
We all have an image in our heads about what our lives are supposed to be like. Some of you may be the “go-getter” type, or maybe you’re the “everything happens for a reason” type.
If you’re a go-getter, you most likely have tunnel vision and you chase after what you want without things distracting you. If you are the “everything happens for a reason” type, you probably don’t care about what you want in the sense that you’d do anything to get it — you let things come to you.
When you are the “everything happens for a reason” type, you don’t always get what you want.
I know this statement holds some controversy. I truly believe everything happens for a reason, but I believe it after I chase what I want and I don’t necessarily get it.
If you sit back and wait for the good things to come, they are going to take their sweet-ass time. For example, if you are into a guy/girl and you don’t show any signs or you don’t put in effort, how are you ever going to be with him or her? He or she is never going to know you’re interested if you don’t let it be known in some way.
Maybe you want your dream job. It’s a competitive job and you know you have the qualifications. Your résumé is better than the next person’s. Are you going to sit back and say, “Everything happens for a reason. If they want to hire me, they will”?
No. You are going to call, ask for an interview, etc. You’re going to do whatever you can to make your candidacy known. You deserve that job.
The only way to get your life to be what you want it to be is to become a go-getter.
Being a go-getter calls for optimism. Optimism is the source of all good. When you are optimistic, you see no boundaries for anything you want to accomplish.
I used to sit around and wait for things to come to me. That created negative energy and I was basically growing a garden of bad thoughts. I decided I had better things to do than sulk about not having anything I wanted. I decided to become eager and hungry for happiness.
When you’re a go-getter, your confidence sky rockets. It allows other people to believe in you because they see that you believe in yourself. If you don’t believe in yourself, then just consider your dreams and goals to be figments of your imagination.
Regardless if the outcome is or isn’t how you pictured it, you’ll know you tried your best and will have the pride of a job well done. When you don’t get what you want, just move on.
Like I said, when you are a go-getter, you have tunnel vision; you look forward and never look back. This kind of mentality is necessary to be successful. Whatever your personal motivation may be — money, happiness or the guy/girl you can’t get out of your head — be a go-getter.
After all, life is what you make it.

@M-jay